Seeing so many, many
Brave, brave Sisters
Giving back what is
No longer Theirs
And realising that at some point
My Heart will need to Speak
*
Here I am
Returning to You
That what is Truthfully
Yours
*
Viz.:
*
All the times You Lied to Me
Even where You could just as well
Have been True
*
The biggest Lie being
That I was your partner
When I was in Truth
Your Other Woman
All those Years
*
All the Manipulation
All the Gas-Lighting
This Feeling of
Desorientation
*
All the times when I
Started to Wake Up
And You said
I was Relapsing
*
And I believed You
*
All the times you said
You would Leave Me
If I ever
Refused having Sex
With You
*
The time you told Me
I was to take care of Papi
Money making Motjo
While being inside Me
And choking Me
*
The time & time again
You told Me
I was Born for that alone
*
And I believed You
*
The time You brought your Cousin Erroll
And the Pair of You raped me
Pushed me in the Corner
And pulled down my pants
Telling Me this was Fun
This was my Training
And not to be Upset
*
And I believed You
*
I still See You Two
Jumping Me like Beasts
His cock down My throat
While I choked & cried
Did He
Pay You for the Favour?
Probably
*
The time You
Bit My neck until I Bled
And Drank My Blood
While fucking Me
*
The time You
Fisted Me anally
While I screamed in Pain
Screamed for Help
For the Police
And No One came
I Saw & Felt
Part of My Soul
Ripping away
I thought I went Crazy
*
And You smiled
And You said
I did so well
With this Bit of Training
*
And I believed You
*
All the Money I made
And You took it away
Just for Safe Keeping
*
And I believed You
*
The time You stayed over
On My Birthday
And Tortured Me
All Night
Saying You were
Showing Me Tricks
To fend off
Bothersome Clients
*
And I believed You
*
All the times You were Drunk
And Unspeakable Things happened
The times you fell into a Stupor
With Your Teeth in my Cherry
And Me not daring
To Stir
For waking You would be
Worse
*
The time I had
Second Degree Burns
All over My Chest
And You insisted I
Work
And You insisted on Sex
Being annoyed
When I cried
*
All the Crying I did
During Sex
And You ignoring Me
*
All the times You
Forced me to Come
And Come again & again
Until the most Sacred Joy
Lost all Meaning
*
And Your Hands
All over Me
Too Hard
At all Times
Because
You had the Right
*
All the Dangerous & Degrading
Situations I was in
Because of the Work
You had Me do
*
All the times You made me
Complicit
In harming other Women
Gas-Lighting Them
Because
I no longer Questioned
You
*
The time Your Friend Jerrell
Drugged & raped anally
One of Your Lady Friends
And you having Me
Alongside
In the same Bed
All in good
Fun
*
The Ways in which You
Controlled me with Magic
The Stuff You put on
Your Dick
Before Sex
Shrugging when I said it stung
*
You Peeing over Me
Regularly
Although I
Hated it
*
You making Me eat the Egg
Your Friend Nelis
Cleansed Me with
*
The Stuff You put
In the Food You brought Me
*
And all the Evil
That You
Sent Me since
For Daring to
Leave
*
And So Much
More
That You did
*
So
Much
More
*
All these Things
I Return to You
*
Robbert Alexander Jones
*
And what I am left with
Is Peace in My Self
*
I need Nothing Else
*
On the Aquarius Lunar New Year
